This will probably be one of the hardest posts I'll ever have to write. I didn't plan on writing this. I didn't even think I would have much to say to you. I know that you'll probably never read this post but in case God allows it to come across your path, I want you to know how I feel.
On Wednesday, August 9th, 2017, you decided that you would drive down a street, pull out a gun, and start shooting. You decided that innocent lives didn't matter. You decided to kill a man you didn't even know.
I want to take this time to say to you, what you may not have realized. I want to take this time to point out some things that may have never crossed your mind…
That guy, that innocent guy, had a son who happens to be my world. No, he isn't my son, but everything about him feels as if I birthed him myself. That kid, that 4 year old kid loves dinosaurs and Avengers. That smart, amazing, wonderful kid is already learning a second language. That same kid loves to play drums and piano and loves to swim and learn about new animals. But most importantly, that kid loves PEOPLE.
You will never understand the damage you caused. You will never understand the pain that comes from the broken heart that will forever break for this little boy. I wish you would have known. I wish you would have thought about it. And maybe that still would not have been enough to change your mind, but at least you would have known how valuable that man you killed was to us. But as much as you may have crushed his heart, you will NEVER break his spirit. I may not have been able to protect his father from you but I promise you I will forever protect his heart from that very hatred you had in yours.
You see, that little boy has something that even with the death of his father, you couldn't take. He has something that regardless of how cruel this world may be, they can't stop. That sweet, loving, charming, sensitive baby boy has PURPOSE and I will spend the rest of my life making sure that he knows it.
I will teach him to hope even when the world seems hopeless. I will teach him to believe in the good of people, even when everyone around him tries to prove otherwise. I will teach him to trust in the leader within himself so that he will know that he was never created to be a follower. I will teach him the power of faith so that when everything around him says to give up, he will know otherwise. But most importantly, I will teach and SHOW him the importance of loving Jesus.
I’m not sure how you were raised or what led to you committing such a hateful act, but I want you to know that I don’t hate you. I just hate the hand you left my baby boy to have to play. Nevertheless, I know that “ALL things work together for the good of those who LOVE GOD and are CALLED according to His purpose.” So whether we get justice for his father, I know that your hateful act won’t go in vain. And I hope one day you have a desire to want to get to know Jesus for yourself. In spite of it all, I love you and every time that little boy asks me about his dad, I will remind him the importance of forgiveness.
He will know who his dad was and how much he loved his son. He will know how much his family supports him through it all. He will know how much his mother loves him and he will know how hard his “TT” fought and will forever fight to protect his heart and his soul. So…you don’t win. I hate what you did but my nephew will grow to be somebody. He will not fear hate but will strive to spread love. I just hope that one day you begin to as well.
